[Mr. Mackey] (Eric Cartman) And everyone should get along.. Okay children quiet down, quiet down Children I'd like to introduce our new substitute teacher for the day His name is Mr. Shady Children quiet down please Brian don't throw that (SHUT UP!) Mr. Shady will be your new substitute while Mr. Kaniff is out with pneumonia (HE'S GOT AIDS!) Good luck Mr. Shady [Eminem] Hi there little boys and girls (FUCK YOU!) Today we're gonna to learn how to poison squirrels But first, I'd like you to meet my friend Bob (Huh?) Say hi Bob! ("Hi Bob") Bob's 30 and still lives with his mom and he don't got a job, cause Bob sits at home and smokes pot but his twelve-year old brother looks up to him an awful lot And Bob likes to hang out at the local waffle spot and wait in the parkin lot for waitresses off the clock when it's late and the lot gets dark and fake like he walks his dog Drag 'em in the woods and go straight to the chopping blocks (AHH!) And even if they escaped and they got the cops the ladies would all be so afraid, they would drop the charge 'til one night Mrs. Stacey went off the job when she felt someone grab her whole face and said not to talk But Stacey knew it was Bob and said knock it off But Bob wouldn't knock it off cause he's crazy and off his rocker Crazier than Slim Shady is off the vodka You couldn't even take him to Dre's to get Bob a "Dr." He grabbed Stace' by the legs as chopped it off her and dropped her off in the lake for the cops to find her But ever since the day Stacey went off to wander they never found her, and Bob still hangs at the waffle diner And that's the story of Bob and his marijuana, and what it might do to you So see if the squirrels want any - it's bad for you Chorus: Mr. Mackey (Eminem)